Log in

Random little shouts

The baby monitor is sitting beside making random little noises.

It echoes the dog, so the dog thinks we have a ghost dog. He is happy. All dogs like to live in a house with a ghost dog.

To comfort himself he steals the baby's bib. He was prevented from stealing it last night, so he stole my shirt.

Maybe he thinks my shirt will ward off the ghost dog he hears in the mornings.

The one on the right is evil

Half way

The best opening of a book ever is Dante's Inferno, and a lot of people have ruined it in attempts to translate it blank to English. However that aside, we often find we are halfway on the road between life and death, and lost our way, Given current actuarial tables, that is where I am. Halfway on the journey. I should, if I was a wiser person reflect on this, but the thing I most notice is how shit people who went into real estate management (who are the same age as me) look.

This is greg the spider

We hate greg the spider


Target Novels

The Sergeant blinked again. Three lights were moving towards him through the murk of the
blizzard. Even as he looked, the lights changed into three tall, straight figures, clad in
silver-armoured suits, advancing across the ice with a slow, deliberate step. Horror-struck,
the Sergeant reached for his gun, and a stream of bullets sprayed across the marching

The capitals just make that for me. Good old Dr Who novels.


Abused, Adulterated, Anti-Psychotic

Cardiac wards, Anti-Psychotic Medication, Survival Knives. When did I become the sort of person you meet on-line. Shocking.

Anyway, lets get down to the serious business of hating question marks with Gertrude Stein

"It is evident that if you ask a question you ask a question but anyone who can read at all knows when a question is a question ... I could never bring myself to use a question mark, I always found it positively revolting"

And she is of course entirely and completely correct, on one hand we have the bizarre crusades against adverbs, yet we insist on using a typographical bibelot slip "questioningly" into our language with gay abandon. Out out damned hookéd spot.

Exclamation marks are even more ghastly, because they make any statement seem breathlessly adolescent, and noisomely false. They need removed as well, under the simple grounds they are another appalling precis of an adverb. In modern language the various stabs at having something denoting sarcasm would at least serve some use, and remove the punch in the throat required for hanging a smiley off the most pointed of abuse.


Banks always move with the times

Here is a recent presentation by StigandNasty, to his board. Classy that man. Classy.


  Early lithograph of Stig

Resurrected in memory of a time long passed when Stig and I slaved over hot photocopiers to impress people we barely knew with pseudonymic foolishness.

How much it all has changed.

I have known Stig for 25 years, one marriage and a loss of hair. Blast from the past time. 

Names have been changed to protect the identity of the party involved.

10 Things you probably didn't know about Duncan Peterson

1.  Duncan boxed for Portugal in the Tokyo Olympics*
2. In his spare time Peter he is a 14 year old Russian Gymnast, called Olga
3. The only person to have ever seen Peter's his alleged wife disappeared under mysterious circumstances (this may 25 years later not be as true as it once was)**
4. Pete Duncan has memorised every word of Dennis Wheatley's "The Golden Spaniard" ***
5. Peter was the dubbed in voice at the end of Bride of Frankenstein, declaring "We belong dead" (note to self remove Peter, replace with Duncan)
6. Duncan's IQ is so high it cannot even be described using scientific notation.****
7. Peterson once played Vittoria in a personally staged version of "The White Devil"
8. Peter is the reincarnation of Prussia
9. Er.. Peter.. or is it Duncan, drives his Ferrari, except when he has to collect people.
10. Peter is universally loved and has lots of friends.

* - He fought at  Carrotweight, a division few enter anymore
** - Most people are now merely prevented from seeing his wife by warding spells
*** - This was of course in the days when it was unfashionable to do so
**** - Or its 50. Take your pick.

Victory of the TV 21 Daleks

I'm only saying....
We finally have carpet. Its fairly cheap and fairly cheerful, but after nearly two years without a carpet in the hall it feels like opulence. Even the underlay seemed exciting. Its amazing what you start to care about when you're just about to turn 26.

That's my story and I'm sticking to it like glued flooring.

So for no real reason I have a stock art collection of footballs

This one struck me, immediately as being a bit beholdery, but after a moment I thought;

"If footballs actually had tentacular spikepoints on them like something from a japanese cartoon, I might actually give a toss about it"

Leading back to Stig and my oft conversations about improving dull sports with petroleum, and or sharks. And in some cases africanised killer bee swarms, which would definately improve cricket. Which is named after insects anyway so that makes perfect sense.

Now I'm thinking about the Cyberman playing golf with Thor, in that old Absolutely sketch.

Boodoodoooboodoo dooo dee diddly boo deee....